Breaking the Path

This week I'm beginning my new project for work, which is an exciting but also anxious time for me. I write alone in my home office eight hours a day, and unless there's a big problem I can't resolve by myself I have no one with whom to share this part of the work. Everything I do over the next month will determine what I do, and how well I do it, for the next half of the year. I need to be creative, original and inventive every day. I try not to think about the weight of that burden so it doesn't get between me and the work, but it's always there, like a big angry cow ready to trample me if I hesitate on the path.

When I begin a project I am very good to myself. I quilt every day on my breaks, which helps keep me from tensing up or brooding. I drink my favorite teas (including an herbal blend that helps me sleep better) and give myself little rewards when I reach my daily goals. I increase my efforts to stay away from things that depress (news) or upset me (politics) or make me angry (toxic people). I read my favorite books for pleasure, and I also write a lot in my desk journal.

I don't mind working alone -- I prefer it -- and I have a lot of experience with bearing the responsibilities. I will remind myself frequently of how lucky I am to have a creative profession, and how happy I feel to be able to do what I love for a living. More than anything that keeps the big angry cow out of my way.

Image credit: matak from Pixabay

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Stuff

After finding this Caron one pound skein of lovely peach yarn in my thrifted lot I raided my stash for two cakes of Mandala in Pegasus, which matches it perfectly. For practice and hand therapy I'm going to make another Worth Street Afghan with this free pattern , but this time I'll use the yarn that was recommended for it plus the one pound skein. I'm not quite ready to do the vintage/recycled linen quilt I had planned (still a bit too nervous about the idea), so I'm going to use some color therapy and make a quilt from these thrifted green fat quarters. I considered doing another Yellow Brick road patchwork pattern, but I might go with a split rail fence like this one.

Journal Find

This is a page from my 2010 poetry journal. My handwriting isn't the best, so I'll transcribe it: If my heart survives to tell all the secrets kept inside it will be an abalone shell in which the beauty did reside. But I think I will always be lost to the tides that rage in me . . . humbling and polishing . . . I don't write many self-portrait poems, but this one isn't too embarrassing. A bit overly dramatic, but the girl I was eleven years ago went through some tough times. I'm in a much more peaceful place today.

The Numbers

Back in March my diabetes doctor changed my medication and encouraged me to alter my diet and exercise more in order to bring down my A1C, which at the time tested out at a dismal 8.3 (normal is 5.8.) So for the next two months I dealt with the increased meds, stuck to my decidedly grim diet and added a lot more walking to my exercise regime. P.S., it's never fun to be a diabetic, but over the last couple of months I've really tried to keep a good attitude about it. Attitude isn't everything, but it helps a lot when you have to make significant changes while battling a disease like this. Yesterday I performed a home A1C test, and I'm currently at 6.5. That's pretty amazing results, even for me. If I can get it down another half point before I see the doctor in July I'd be over the moon, but I feel like I've already done great. Image credit: Image by Daniele Liberatori from Pixabay

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