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Resisting

I think the reason I've always kept my textile art private in the past is because I've already dealt with a lot of harsh criticism with my writing. That comes with the territory, and I learned to handle it as a pro. I also know that I'm never going to be a professional level textile artist; I'm just enjoying something I love to do. I have taught myself almost everything I know from books. Nor do I expect everyone to love my work or praise me. I know some of the things I make are too weird for that, or not executed well.

I know all this, and yet when someone says something unkind about my work or my lack of skills, it still hurts. I automatically think I should go back to hiding what I do rather than to show it to anyone. This happened recently to me, but I think for the first time I resisted that awful urge to run and hide.

Like this little guy I don't want to be out in the open or get a lot of attention, but I want to share what I do with people who are kind enough to ignore my flaws and see the joy. I don't think that's too much to ask, especially as I always try to be encouraging to other artists.

As for the unkind, they probably had to deal with a lot of harsh criticism too, and are just repeating the cycle without realizing it. Or they have hate in their hearts, which is absolutely the worst thing to live with, I think. So rather than be frightened of them, I'm going to remember to feel some compassion. I look at people like that who are hateful to others and think, be mindful, for that could easily be me. When they're hateful to me, I should do the same thing -- and be grateful I broke the cycle and escaped that.

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